Negative action, according to karma

Image: Richard Bradley (Spiders in Ohio)

Spiders became my regular roommates, much more welcome than the occasional scorpions who came to visit. The big spiders would appear as if by magic, beamed in one day to a spot on the wall where they would remain for days or weeks, looking as if they’d always been there and would always remain. While there, they seemed never to move or else would creep very slowly for just a few inches only to settle into stillness again. 

Then one day, they’d be gone just as suddenly and inexplicably as they’d appeared. Some people were bothered by the spiders on principle, but I wasn’t. We had an understanding, I suppose, and lived easily together, each with our own territory and rhythm. Our unspoken boundaries held well. Never even a spat. For me, these big spiders were like trees—and seemed almost as rooted until they disappeared without trace.

The smaller, quicker spiders were more startling. Sometimes they appeared in my concrete sink as I washed dishes. I tried to lift them out of the sink to save them from drowning but, invariably, I regretted the attempt. I can’t tell you how many spiders I’ve apologized to for inadvertently amputating their legs in my attempt to rescue them. I’ll be making amends for several lifetimes.

I always had a soft heart for creatures. I remember my parents handing me a can of insecticide and directing me to kill the flies in our backyard before guests arrived for a barbecue. I must have been ten or twelve years old. Tears streamed down my face as I obeyed my parents’ instructions and sprayed, muttering through gritted teeth, “But why can’t we all live in peace?!”

Fortunately, motivation counts when it comes to karma. For a negative action to be complete in a karmic sense, four characteristics must be present. The action must be directed toward a particular object. (I’d have to have a particular bug in mind.) The actor must have an intention-carrying thought. (I’d need a desire to do harm.) The actor has to take action in line with that thought. (I’ll get you, damn spider!) And the goal must be achieved. (Intended target hit.) Luckily for me, I had no such intention toward the spiders in my sink. Unluckily for the spiders, they still lost their legs.

~ Leslie Rinchen-Wongmo
from Threads of Awakening